This might sound shocking or make me sound like I hate marriage, but it is truly the fact the opposite. Let me explain:
I was blessed to be a bridesmaid 6 times before I got married! I was able to walk with my closest friends and see the process of engagement to the big day! One thing I started to notice as I watched each precious friend become a Mrs. was that on that big day, none of the small details mattered. All that I saw was love in their eyes as they made vows, promising to always love, honour, and respect. It didn’t matter if something small was missed, it just mattered that they were now forever together.
When my husband and I got engaged, I knew that no matter what we planned that this day would be special! We also decided we wanted to do things that honoured our guests and made them feel genuinely appreciated by us. I also said “screw it” to so much traditions because it didn’t fit our personalities, it wasn’t “us”.. Having my husband crawl up my dress to retrieve a garter belt with his teeth or dragging all my single friends onto the floor just didn’t excite me! I decided on so many untraditional things for our wedding such as instead of programs I had made booklets called “Our Story” of how we met and our relationship with our bridal party so that our guests could know us better (and have something to read during speeches if they chose).
On our big day we had a “first look” which was perfect and did our photos before the ceremony so our guests wouldn’t have to wait on us! We had a wonderful pastor who delivered a phenomenal ceremony in under 20 minutes. We had my dream venue in a big white tent in the middle of nowhere, the weather was perfect, my flowers were simple babies breath bundles made by a friend, and the decor was exactly us. The music I had customized to specific songs from our favourite genres and wouldn’t be classified as “typical wedding”! We had a few speeches but kept them short and sweet!
Our wedding was magical and wonderful but I would not say it was the best day of my life. After all, it was just one day.. The best days of my life started the morning I woke up beside my husband for the first time; when we began our marriage journey, walking hand in hand and choosing to do life together in an impactful way.
I really believe we live in a world that romanticizes weddings but does not romanticize marriage.
I have heard from many people for every hour you plan your wedding, take an hour to plan your marriage. Beautiful weddings take planning but great marriages take hard work every day (I might add it’s usually the most fun type of work). It is a very unique experience for me to have factor someone into all my choices. Not only do we now share a space but so much more than that: we share a God breathed connection.
I am excited for so many Best Days ahead. I look forward to this adventure of working at continuing being newlyweds for our whole life, I look forward to finding out we are pregnant, I look forward to seeing my husband hold our babies for the first time, I look forward to growing old with him.
If you are single, live everyday as your best day while preparing yourself to be the best wife or husband possible! If you are engaged, plan the wedding of your dreams! Go all out and let your personality sparkle. It will be your big day! If possible have some premarital counselling as it makes the transition smoother. Never forget though that there is a day after your wedding: marriage.. It can be more than you could ever hope or dream of when you both give it your all!